Man, the Koreans do not like to leave anything to the imagination
Pretty crazy
I don’t know if you guys watch Korean movies, but you should. If you haven’t checked out The Host then do yourself a favor, check it out. This is an awesome movie about the Korean war from the perspective of two South Korean brothers. The scenes are so graphic it’s almost like a zombie flick. Gotta love them Koreans.
I can’t believe you haven’t seen “Raw Deal”
Edit:9/12/08 - I’ve totally seen this, with Gar members. I must have had a couple of drinks. Damnit.
How can Alex have not seen this movie yet?
“Mark Kaminsky is kicked out of the FBI for his rough treatment of a suspect. He winds up as the sheriff of a small town in North Carolina. FBI Chief Harry Shannon, whose son has been killed by a mobster named Patrovina, enlists Kaminsky in a personal vendetta with a promise of reinstatement into the FBI if Patrovina is taken down. To accomplish this, Kaminsky must go undercover and join Patrovina’s gang.”
I can’t believe I haven’t seen this movie yet. I love technology. I’m really excited to see this, I only wish I could watch this with some, as TDub would say, of my boys.
Deathrace a la Jason Statham
So I had my hesitation’s about watching this movie. I thought, hey, I’ll download this. It was a mistake to not watch this the theaters. I’m an idiot. You know why this movie is good?
It doesn’t try to justify anything. No explanations. That’s what I need in a movie, and that’s what I need in comics.
I can shoot bullets from my eyes, you know why? No. You don’t, because I’m shooting bullets out of my fucking eyes. That’s what you’re concerned with right now. And that’s what this movie does, it makes you shoot bullets out of your eyes.
District B13
Alright, so this movie might be one of the most amazing action films I’ve seen in a long time. It has awesome cliches, poor dubbing, fast cars, lots of guns, heroin, and gambling. Holy-crap this thing is awesome. I just watched some awesome shit. It deals with the whole I’m-a-cop-about-to-retire-can’t-do anything-dangerous thing in the most amazing way possible.
There’s dirty cops, bullets galore. It is french so it uses parkour or however the fuck you spell it. That is a problem. But I don’t think I’ve ever watched an action movie before today, which is another problem.
It’s just turned into the most clever buddy movie I’ve ever seen. Holy fuck, it got even more clever.
Now there is a guy called Yeti. Jeezus. It’s getting a little slow while it tries to build tension. A job it isn’t doing well. I bet it’s about to get good again, I can feel it.
The ending is shit, the script is horrible and full of holes. I love it.
Is Bruce Willis the Charles Bronson of our generation?
I just finished watching “16 Blocks” and I do have to say it is quite the mediocre movie. I bought it before I saw it. You know why? I can’t resist a Bruce Willis movie any more than I can resist a Bronson movie. I see that face on a cover, holding a gun, next to Mos Def and I see paradise.
Is Willis our Bronson? The differences between Bronson and Willis are not so readily apparent.
Tit-for-tat strategy
I like watching Beauty and the Geek. I don’t feel guilty about it all. I like watching a bunch of hot girls on tv team up with a bunch of nerds. That’s great tv to me. I think there’s parts that are hilarious, like when people are voted off early and they talk about how much the experience has changed their life. I laugh to myself and say get real. You’re still the same nervous geek/mean, hot girl.
I hate the predictable production and commercial jumps.
I like watching Beauty and the Geek because I like seeing nerds agonize over sending people to elimination, and being shocked that they get mad about. I like the exceedingly high-pitched girl voices on some of the girls, and I like the weird laughs that come out of nerds. I like it because nerds say things like “Tit-for-tat strategy” or relate everything to classes they took in Ivy League colleges.
But I guess Ivy League colleges tend to have that effect on everyone who comes out of them, like, I’m way smarter then you, trust me, more life experience because of the school I went to. I like seeing that on the tv. I also like hot chicks. I like geek make overs, and geeks being taught how to wash their hair, or how wearing your day clothes to bed is not a good thing, or how deodorant is a good thing. I like all of that stuff.
3 Russians and a Baby
it’s always weird watching a movie with my mom, when the inevitable happens…a woman is getting banged from behind by Viggo Mortensen, He is grimacing, and now he is asking the girl where she is from. While she is singing a song to console herself. Viggo you are a good man. The girl looks like Tara Reid. I can’t believe I bought this movie. Naomi watts wants a prostitutes baby, as a dead prostitute narrates.
I don’t like the father, he is the least believable as a Russian mobster. The baby looks to be the key. Now the Russian mobster is insinuating a diary for a baby. Presents = From France and old as fuck. Kirill is probably gay. I like how Russians speak in English to each other. I think the problem with this movie is it takes itself too seriously. But then again, there is no problem with me. Note to self: I should be always wearing a suit, and I need to cut my hair and gel it back…all the time.
A ticking clock was just introduced. The plot line with the mom of Naomi Watts shouldn’t even be in this movie. They’re totally going to try to kill Viggo, aren’t they? I bet you Viggo has a thing or two to say about that. The movies been on a pretty slow place since…I guess since Viggo was bent over that shell of a girl…I don’t ever think I’ve ever seen this much naked man-fighting in my life.
Ugh, who could like this movie. This is not an action movie, nothing interesting in it happens. This may as well be called 3 Russians and a Baby. Now Kirill is crying over the baby…like a baby. Who knew a mob boss could be so cowardly. The movie could end now. But it’s not going to is it? Prologue…are you kidding me? This was a Cronenberg movie? Damn.
This movie gets a C- in awesomeness. I don’t know what you guys say in this movie…John Balboa was WAY better than this.
Who wants to write a movie?
So I was watching Red Heat yesterday, and I realized that my friends and I have enough knowledge to write an awesome movie. I’m serious, I already have a plot in mind. I have the star in mind. How bad could we do? Probably as good as Red Heat. I mean, is it me or have all the awesome movies left us behind. There are no movies comparable to Over the Top, Red Heat, Money Train, Blood Sport. We need to bring these movies back. I was thinking we could start with a trailer. Who’s with me?
Why do I love Sylvester Stallone so much?
“You got no mercy, you got not loyalty, and you got no fucking code.” That’s the line from The Specialist, which I’m sure you guys have seen. Sharon Stone, James Woods, Eric Roberts, and Sylvester Stallone. The S-tone gets naked and has sex with all the leading characters in her typical form. Stallone is an expert in explosives. He hates knives and guns. He likes explosives. He has loyalty, mercy, and code. James Woods does not but is also an expert in explosives, who currently works for some Puerto Rican Don in Florida. Stallone has a 14.4kbps modem that connects to a Bulletin Board Service. James Woods hates Stallone.
This is a movie someone can be into. These are the types of movies Stallone has come to be known for. Stallone has been in 55 tv/movie things, according to IMDB. That’s a lot of tv/movie things. But keep in mind Charles Bronson had 162 tv/movie appearances.
Sly even did some softcore porn, which is incidentally his first movie. Here’s a review,”Other unbelievable scenes: Sly flexes his muscles in a mirror while watching a lesbian scene, a woman flashes Sly in the park, Sly rapes Kitty after she slaps him, and the film ends with Sly slapping Kitty.” Doesn’t that sound terrible. Yes it does. He was even in a movie with Dolly Parton, where he arm wrestles her. That’s crazy!
Don’t go watch Cloverfield, I’m an idiot
Yesterday I saw Cloverfield with my good friend alex roome. 
I thought it was a good movie because it had an awesome monster, and the story didn’t suck that much. But was I blown away? No. Was I thrilled? Not really, I may have audibly muttered one or two “oh shits” as the movie went on it’s dizzying pace…and that masterfully brings me to the reason to why I should have hated the movie. I got fucking motion sick watching the movie. It physically made me sick. I payed 10 dollars to feel like I was going to puke up all the delicious fried chicken I had just consumed.
Now you might say, come on Pouria, you like the movie though, you’re always ragging on movies. And I’ll say to you, yes you’re right. That’s why I was recommending the movie to people today, and saying BUT it makes you totally sick BUT you should see it, it’s awesome…it’s your fault I recommended it. You. The person who made me think twice about a movie giving me a physical revulsion. It’s also my fault for being weak and letting your judgments turn around the way I think. Fuck you, the movie sucked. No boobs, the hot chicks were all getting ruined, and it’s the type of movie that people stay stupid shit in the elevator like “Oh I didn’t like the ending.” You know why you didn’t like the ending, it wasn’t happy, and for some reason you couldn’t predict it…so you were shocked and you’re an idiot.
You know what was a twisted fucking move? Fido.
You know what else, it was fucking good. Real good. Buy-for-my-squalid-movie-collection good. Yes Billy fucking Connelly is in it, but don’t worry, he doesn’t say a damn word, because he’s an f-ing zombie. It’s twisted. It’s good. It doesn’t make you motion sick. Did I mention twisted?
